11 Ways to be Completely Awful at Fraternity Recruitment

by Taylor Deer

We at Phired Up spend so much time giving good advice that I think its time to take a break and give you some awful, terrible, advice that you should never ever use. With that being said, here are 11 different ways to be completely awful at recruitment:

1) Don’t talk to anyone who is not in your chapter…except when you’re asking the question “Have you ever thought about joining Greek Life?” When they say “no” and walk away, make sure you say “pffff GDI” and walk away…

2) Get your name out there! Make sure you spend all of your time, ALL of your time, designing and copy-writing major beer distributors’ logos and sticking them on T-Shirts and Flyers. Nothing says leadership like not being able to create your own brand. We know that people join fraternities because of their relationships with the members of that chapter. So, this will make sure you don’t have any time to do any of that.

3) Don’t keep track of your potential new members. You’re smart, you will absolutely be able to recall important information of about 50 potential new members when the time comes. If you forget five or 10 dudes no biggie, they probably weren’t going to make good brothers any way.

4) Don’t set any goals. When brothers ask how recruitment is going, you just respond, “Great! Real solid group of guys… real studs.” Be sure to remember that when you have a smaller than average pledge class to lean on the argument, “were about quality not quantity.”

5) Don’t seek any advice from anyone. Not the past recruitment chair, not professional recruitment education companies, no one. Its your first year in the position and your second year in college, you DEFINITELY have the experience it takes to establish a high performing recruitment system for your chapter. And definitely don’t click on this link.

6) During the bid meeting, make sure that every member gets to say “he’s a good guy” and “he’s super chill” multiple times per candidate. Nothing gives a more accurate picture of quality membership than subjective and nebulous labels that no one really understands.

7) NEVER join other clubs and organizations. The dudes who deserve to join your chapter will always find you one way or another.

8) Walk in big groups with matching Fraternity T-Shirts. This is the best way to never meet anyone and to get your name out there simultaneously. Its a twofer.

9) Instead of spending money on things that directly communicate your chapter’s values and attract people with those same values… Throw the biggest parties! The highest performing organizations with the highest quality members who make a daily impact on the world probably all attract those members because of how many kegs they can put in their basement.

10) Casually hand out as many bids as possible. Saw some kid wearing a “chill to pull ratio” T-shirt. Give him a bid. Tell him to take it and think about it for a few days, then bring it back to your house if he’s in. The best of the best only make rash decisions to join lifelong organizations when given a piece of paper by a stranger.

11) Make sure to never question your process. Say things like “that’s just the way it is” and “that’s just how our system works”. If you change something, even if its a small something, you might find out that it works better and you definitely don’t want that!

I hope you read every single one of these and do the exact opposite. If you want to figure out how EXACTLY to do that. Check out all of this free knowledge that will help you out: